Last weekend, I attended an E-Women Conference in Rockford, IL. The theme for the weekend was Embracing Powerful Peace. The conference featured some very dynamic speakers...and I felt like they were speaking directly to me! I entered the weekend feeling stressed, tired, overwhelmed and a bit defeated. I was not even close to embracing peace.
Since the birth of our son, Joe and I have struggled to find a balance in our relationship. I am sure many of you have encountered a lack of balance in your marriage. Well for us, what started out as tired, worn-out, and weary turned into bitterness, anger and apathy. How could this happen in less than 8 months? We had allowed our relationship to plummet to the bottom of the pile. On top of it, we had heaped work, school, grocery lists, laundry, unspoken expectations, the stress of caring for our new baby boy and everything else. Our hands were full of everything BUT a solution to our marriage woes. We attempted to pull our relationship to the top of the pile a few times, but it was quickly covered but other “pressing” matters.
We had a discussion about our marriage on our way to and from Rockford. Though we were not sure what to do, we both agreed that something had to change. Stubbornly, we expected the other to find a solution which paved the way for a fight about not being able to drum up a solution.
After we got home, I began to pray and reflect upon the weekend. Through this process, I was continually drawn to one main point I heard from Donna VanLiere, NY Times Best Selling Author. She said, "God gives where He finds empty hands."
I realized, it was this statement that made the whole weekend worth it. I understood that Joe and I were in the place where God wanted us to be. God had been waiting patiently for us to figure out that we couldn’t improve our marriage, but He could. Our hands were empty and our hearts were searching for a solution. After I told Joe about my revelation, he too understood that we needed to focus on giving our relationship to the Lord, rather than try to fix things ourselves.
In the short amount of time between the conference and now, our relationship has already taken a huge turn. Though we are not any less tired or stressed, we are more patient and considerate of each other. Even when Joe does forget to take the chap stick out of his pocket before throwing his pants in the laundry after I have reminded him what seems to be a thousand times. I know that if I didn’t have Joe tomorrow…it wouldn’t matter if I had chap stick stains on every piece of clothing I owned. So I have decided that the little things don’t matter! I am continually trying to serve Joe and focus on the wonderful things he does, instead of dwell on the things that tend to irritate me. I know I am not perfect and I will allow myself to get irritated from time to, but I trust that Joe will be patient with me and I know the Lord will gently remind me what is important in life.
Galatians 5:22 says, “But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control…” I pray that God will help me to not only Embrace Powerful Peace but cling to an attitude that produces the sweet fruit of the Spirit!
No comments:
Post a Comment